How can you describe a heart that has been clouded with love and raining with sorrow? How can you describe the yearn of looking into the eyes of the person that sets your soul on fire? How can you pluck those feelings from intangibility to words? I was lost, I couldn’t even voice them out. I never saw him properly, just a peek, from the corner of my eyes and I wanted to drink in his features forever. How would you know how to love when you never did? Why would you sail with a broken heart when you never knew one?
He conquered my thoughts like the mightiest of all storms, drowning my mind. I closed my eyes and he haunted the darkness that it came after. Flowers blossomed inside of me when I thought of his smile and I was spring all at once. I couldn’t fathom those emotions and never would. The memory of him followed me everywhere and when it was time to say goodbye I was broken. I was pieces of what I was, crumbling down a hill of agony knowing that we might never see each other again. I wasn’t sane, I didn’t feel like myself at all.
I loved walking down that rainy path, drenching my skirt in water and waiting for him to step out of the shadows. I loved seeing him walk through that rainy path where the puddles reflected the twinkling lights turning everything magical. It made him look handsomer than ever and that made my heart skip a thousand beats. It made my heart squeeze in anticipation that he might notice me but it never happened. Could one person feel all that? Emotions that had the combustion capacity of a supernova. I still left and he still didn’t know how much pain he caused me. Maybe it was just another chapter folding away into a dusty past. Yet, had the rawness of a moment ago.
Mariam Q 